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Why did you stop offering Reiki treatments and training?

I hear these questions a lot, along with:

...but you are so good at it! ...when will you be returning? you miss it? just need to set better boundaries.

Crown for Kali, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media
Crown for Kali, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media

Reiki and spirituality found me when I needed them. My awareness of the Divine Feminine hooked me by stealth - I was researching ideas around the Goddess for a crown series I was working on. The more I read the more I discovered there was more to life as I had known it. I even read Jung's The Red Book as part of my research. It was only when Reiki also found me that I physically felt the power of energy flow through my body and my life took a new path. The atheist and sceptic in me held out until my late thirties but all in good time as they say.

Crown for Persephone, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media
Crown for Persephone, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media

Fast forward to 2023, I spent a lot of time struggling to maintain a healthy balance between making, teaching and giving Reiki treatments. My business was growing steadily and I was building a good reputation for offering unique and powerful Reiki treatments. I work a little differently and strived to give absolutely everything I had to each person that chose me to channel energy for them. It was an honour and I felt it was my duty to do the very best that I could, often to the detriment of my own health.

Crown for Diana, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media
Crown for Diana, Teresa Crickmar, 2019, mixed media

I've heard a lot of talk about how Reiki practitioners burn out, how the exchange of energy flowing through us leaves a shadow of the client. I was always careful to set the intention of being a pure channel, to set and clear myself before and after along with pacing the appointments but still I couldn't maintain my balance. I speak a little about my realisation in an earlier post dated June 2023. Even then I thought I'd return after a little rest.

I've taken the decision to pause my direct practise as I am currently working on my own wellbeing. I have not given myself a deadline for healing, instead I am honouring my personal journey. This is not to say that Reiki is not flowing, I continue to practise the five principles in everything I do, from the work I make to the students I teach. My personal journey with creativity and Gaia continues to influence my life. Even my jewellery brand speaks to the surrender of ownership with the name Dea + me. Dea means Goddess. My work aims to invite the wearer to know that they are a unique, worthy divine being. The methods I use play with the properties of metal, from fold-forming (hammering to the edge of stability) to fusing (tinkering on the edge of destruction) to describe how one can endure trauma and still something wonderful and precious can be achieved. 

I don't know what the future holds, but I do know everything that has found me has done so for my own healing and growth. I can surrender and honour her Divine Guidance. It's time to concentrate on me, my goals and my recovery. I believe that to be an active lightworker takes a lot of courage and determination, that to have known trauma is to be able to emphasise and connect. I also need to show up as the best version of myself from now on. Thank you for being part of my journey.

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